Bolder!

Finding Your Why

Do you see visions? I’m not talking about out of body experiences here but rather – do you have an idea of what your Ideal Life would look like?

What part do you dreams and gifts play in your Vision? Do you know the difference you want to make in your world?

Visioning should be the foundation for everything else you do in your life. In my coaching practice I often come across people who scoff at the idea of a Vision Plan and throw up barriers and reasons why it won’t work for them. Those barriers and reasons most often come from a place of fear; Fear that their vision is too powerful; Fear that they will be required to move out of their comfort zone;  Fear that they might have to actually do something and that it might be too late.

What they find, once they complete the visioning process, is joy, motivation and a sense of being in the right place.

Wouldn’t you rather be pulled along by joy? In order to create that pull, you need connection to your core values & purpose.

Making up a vision can feel like a fairy tale - entertaining but not 'realistic' but any act of creation is simply making something up. And the greatest truth about our own lives is that we get to make them up.

Your vision is really more than pure invention. It's based on who you are, what you are passionate about & what you yearn to create in the world.  Whether you realize it or not, you're creating your tomorrow right now.  Why not do it on purpose and make it the one you want?

A warning here – A 'How' will kill a good 'What' every time. Don't worry about the details. Dare to Dream big. The how’s come much later in the process and they usually take care of themselves. 

Living in Colour

Life's too short to spend it on things we're not connected to but sometimes we need a little inspiration.

I've created a new category called Bolder Women to introduce you to some amazing women who are an inspiration to me. I hope they will inspire you as well. Many of them won't be in the news - yet. They are simply women like you and I who have something important they need to get up to.

For instance, meet Vicki Pinkerton, a fellow coach and all round Bolder Woman. 

I met Vicki a number of years ago at a writer's retreat and we've been friends and colleagues ever since. Vicki was a big reason I ended up in the Yukon on a journey of re-discovery but now Vicki is getting ready to head out on her own dream quest - a driving trip across Canada.

Community is important to Vicki. So much so that she's dedicating the next part of her life to exploring the concept. She plans to just stop wherever the spirit moves her and meet the people in that place. Engage them in conversation and discover how alike and how different we all are. She will share what she learns with the world, using her considerable writing talent.

I can't even recall the first time she talked about it. This dream has been part of her for as long as I've known her but first she had a family to launch and a university degree to complete. However, the kids have flown, she graduated last May and now nothing stands in her way. She took a big gulp last fall and got into action. Now her departure date is almost here. 

I'll let Vicki tell this part.

"May 5th my driving buddy and I strike out at the crack of dawn heading for British Columbia (from Ontario). We will be pushing it. No exploring on the way…well, maybe a little. I will visit there long enough to catch my breath and head for friends and family in Pitt Meadow, Victoria, Campbell River and then on to my eventual starting point in Port Hardy. I am overwhelmed with excitement. I’m not sleeping…every moment of down time is spent with my mind spinning…don’t forget this, what if that….

I want to live my life in colour."

I love her last line. Are you living in colour?

What colour would your dreams be?

What does that colour signify to you?

What would be a 'gulp' for you?  Are you willing to take it?

Do you have a quest in your future?

If you'd like to follow Vicki vicariously on her quest she will be blogging about her experiences at www.questacrosscanada.com. I know she'll welcome your comments and support.

Success Fears

Yesterday I wrote that most of us are more afraid of success than failure. It's a pretty generally accepted piece of wisdom put out there by poets and coaches but as I wrote those words I wondered "Is that really true?"

So, lacking a scientific poll, I've put one up here on this blog and my website. I'd love to get your response to this intriguing question.

The people I have spoken to about this subject seem to feel the wisdom holds true and their reasons tend to fall into one of these areas:

1) Fear of having to do it again

    "I'm afraid it might be a fluke."

2) Unwanted Attention

    Those voices that once told you "Don't be bold." Now they live in your head and they can be pretty loud. People often express this fear as not wanting to be different.

3) Fear of the Future

    This one covers a lot of ground from not wanting to move to losing loved ones and all kinds of things in between. The foundation of it is fear of change.

4) Scarcity Mentality

    There's not enough to go around. Often this is someone else's fear expressed as jealousy which then leads you back to reason #3.

I'd love to hear what you think about why fear of success is what holds us back from getting real about our dreams. 

The Action Habit

In the December issue of Oprah is an interview with Jessica Lange who reveals "If I had to start over, I'd pursue photography."

That piqued my curiosity so I Googled her and found out she's only 60. Plenty of time to follow her dream. So I was delighted to also learn that Ms. Lange published a book of photographs in 2008. A great role model for Boomer Women who still have stuff to accomplish!

I can almost hear some of you. "She's Jessica Lange -- of course, she got her book published."

That's not what I'm writing about here. I want you to get that she got into action and took the photographs. She put them into a collection. Her passion found expression though action.

So - what's your passion? What would you do if you weren't too old or didn't need more training or were smarter or.... Do you see where I'm going with this?  These are just excuses to hide the fear of getting real about your dreams.

The real truth is, most of us aren't afraid of failing; we're actually afraid we might succeed so we find a reason not to start. The only antidote to this fear is to create an 'action habit'. If you're in action you can't be afraid because you're too busy.

How do you get the action habit?

1) Don't bite off so much that it overwhelms you but do stretch yourself. Bite off enough to really fill your mouth, then chew carefully. Take the next bite.

2) Cultivate the habit of action. If you see something that needs doing, step up and start without worrying about what others may think. Usually you'll find the others were waiting for someone else to step in.

3) Don't wait for perfect conditions. Perfection is a myth. Good enough is good enough. Get started and revise later.

4) Similarly, don't wait for the right mood. Do you think successful authors wait for the muse to visit? It states in their contracts when they have to deliver and I can assure you it doesn't say "When you feel like it". The same applies to your dream. Create a contract with yourself and don't let moods dictate your actions.

Dreams alone have no value. They only have value when you act on them.

What excuses are keeping you from action?

What's the real truth behind the excuse?

What would you do if the excuse didn't exist?

When are you going to do it?