Bolder!

Bold Dreams

I've been promoting a free event in May - "In Praise of Bolder Women". It's made me wonder - am I talking about living boldly while holding back part of myself?

A little voice is telling me that could be true. Here's why.

How can I get across to you that taking action on a dream is vital if I'm not sharing the impact of my own dreams? 

Part of the responsibility of having a dream is sharing it. So I realised it's time for me to share more fully with you, my readers, so that we are both richer for it. It feels like a really bold step because sharing the reality of those dreams can take me to some vulnerable places. It's easier to hide.

A few years back, when I got real about what I wanted in my life, I began expressing myself through various forms of visual art and also my writing. I discovered my creativity was an expression of my spirituality because it let me listen to my soul's language. I re-claimed dreams that had been constricted and hidden for far too long.

When I was a kid, I wanted black patent leather shoes with tiny straps but my mother bought me a pair of awful brown oxfords. You know the kind. Sturdy and ugly. (Why do mothers do these things to their kids?)

I wore them for about a week, feeling self-conscious and drab. They were stiff and uncomfortable and I hated them with all of my ten year old heart. So I did the only thing any sane kid would do.

I took them to the creek down the road and set them afloat. The last I saw of them they were headed for Waterman's Lake. For all I know they're still there today, terrorizing fishermen who have the misfortune of hooking one.

Now, you need to know that my mother was not a woman to trifle with but I don't remember what transpired when I arrived home barefoot. (Obviously I survived since I'm here to tell the tale.) The fact I don't remember tells me the important part of this story for me was about taking action on something I was passionate about.

Lately, though, it seems I've been wearing those brown oxfords again. It's time for me to take them off and enjoy the feel of the bare earth on my feet again. To re-claim and walk comfortably in my dreams. Won't you join me?

Where are you holding yourself back?

What is the limiting belief or fear that keeps you there?

What would change if you took action on your dream?

What would be possible if you fully lived your dream?

Susan Boyle, Bolder Woman

I had planned to blog on something else today but simply HAD to share this with you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY

Talk about a Bolder Woman claiming her dream. As I watched the faces of the judges and the audience as she spoke before singing I felt anger at how she was being pre-judged. When she mentions her age they are almost rolling their eyes.

And then she opens her mouth to sing...

The shock on those same faces is priceless. My favourite moment (besides the singing itself)?  Watching Simon's eyebrows shoot up.

I've seen Les Miserables at least 4 times live. Never did the words of this song strike home so deeply as they did, watching Susan, in spite of the reactions around her, claim her precious dream. I was moved to tears.

Three things stood out for me. Susan's bold cheekiness in spite of her reception; the support in the wings who believed in her; and she didn't hold back when her moment arrived.

What's your dream?
Where can you find support for yourself?
And what do you need to do so that you don't hold back?

If you want to connect with some other amazing Bold Women, join me in May for "In Praise of Bolder Women". The aim of this FREE event is to inspire and help you get into action with your own dream.
Register online at the link above.

Don't hold back. Join me now in bringing more cheeky boldness to the world!

Wisdom of Yoda

Yoda, Jedi Master and Life Coach, knew what he was talking about when he told Luke "There is no try, only do." He understood the impact of our words on our actions.

I realized this when I found myself writing a list of "I wants" in my journal. I hear "I wants" from my clients all the time. Some pretty common ones sound something like this:

I want to lose weight.
I want a successful business.
I want a fulfilling relationship.
I want balance.

The list of examples could go on and on. I'm sure you have your own personal favorites. But hold on a moment and think about what you're really telling yourself.

Those two little words "I want" indicate a holding pattern, a hope that the desired outcome will just happen to fall into your lap. They keep you waiting. They let you off the hook. "I want" is a passive statement.

You may feel you've accomplished something because you voiced what you wanted. After all, you've indicated your desire, right?  Well, not quite. What you've actually done is released some of the pressure you felt to take action. Too many "I want's " and you may be drifting dangerously close to victimhood.

The good news is that the cure is simple. Shift from power-draining to power-filled just by re-framing your list using "I am". Those words require action even if it's only acting as if the statement is already true. They are the mustard seed moving mountains.

Try re-framing some of the statements in the first list and feel the difference:

I am maintaining my health through balanced eating and exercise.
I am doing work that fulfills me.
I am creating a relationship with myself.
I am always moving toward balance.

And, as Yoda would tell you, "Don't serve the dark side." If your self-talk uses the power of "I am" to beat you up, it's time to re-frame those statements as well.

One caveat - your "I am " statement must contain a grain of truth or your brain will know you're trying to pull a fast one.  It can't (or won't) adjust to going from 0 to 200 mph in 12 seconds. You'll feel a tap on your shoulder as Doubt takes a seat, waiting to grab the wheel. His cousin, Discouragement is probably in the back seat.

If you're actually  struggling to make ends meet, then "I am successful with all the income I need"  may be too big of a stretch. Stretch,yes, but build possibility into your words. Try something like "I am growing a successful business",  Your brain can get behind that and says "Yup. I'll buy that."

Now you can go into action, knowing that the bigger statement waits ahead of you as you grow into your power.

Yoda would be proud of you.

Dear Success Seeker

Every once in awhile I come across a book I keep on my desk so it's handy when I need a dash of inspiration.

"Dear Success Seeker" is one of those books for me. It's a collection of original letters from some pretty amazing women. Women such as Rosa Parkes, Patti LaBelle, Phylicia Rashad and Billie Jean King. Diverse fields of success but with a very important commonality. They are all role models, success figures and, most of all, generous to the women coming up behind them.

If you want to know their "secrets to success", they've willingly shared with the editor, Dr. Michele Wright, a highly successful woman herself. Dr. Wright overcame a learning disability and severe speech impediment (she didn't speak before the age of 5) to earn her PhD in Public Policy and become recognized as an expert in the field of success.

She calls the women who contributed to her book "Success Warriors". I love that!  Strong women who are holding out a hand to you and me as we put our own dreams into action. Women who know what it's like to struggle but keep going. Women we can look up to.

One thing struck me as I read these letters. Vision, either planned out or spur of the moment inspired these women and got them into action. You can feel their connection to inner values and a life purpose through their letters. And, because they are included as Success Warriors, I know they didn't back away, even when the going was hard or the path difficult to find.

Dr. Wright had a vision, too, for this book . "Enjoy this book and savor every priceless word of wisdom; then certainly you will be equipped with the necessary tools to be successful, and one day go out to invest in the lives of others."

I love the balance and generosity in that statement. Success for its own sake isn't enough. We are meant to go out and invest it in the most precious of commodities - lives.

If you're serious about your own success, do yourself a favour and get a copy of this book to keep close by. Consider it an investment in your own success.

__________________________________________________________________________________________

Plan to join me as I welcome Michele Wright to be my first guest during my exciting and free on-line event -

"In Praise of Bolder Women"

The live web cast will be on May 7 at 6 pm EST.

Register at www.aprillejanes.com/bolderwomen.htm

 to receive exclusive invitations to all the events in May.